I cry while I write this poetry.
Sometime in 2009...

Dear girl in red coat
Too pretty for the Front Page
Why don't you try Fur?
---
Hippie served himself
Just grabbed a beer from the bar
Why can't I do that?
---
Drunk girls dance poorly
They don't know how white they are
Hip Hop ain't for you
---
Hey, look at this guy
He probably says dumb things
Like "moving forward"
---
This guy is too close
He is all up on my shit
I am not your friend
---
That girl is a bitch
You can tell by looking at
Her stupid bitch face
---
Wow, that blond dude there
Looks just like Keanu Reeves
Minus all the charm
---
I killed the wrong smoke
Don't matter, the bartender
Just dumped the ashtray
---
I must try to write
A song from these bar Haikus
They're sort of funny
---
Yes, that's right, sweetheart
Tonight you are going home
with that dippy fuck
---
Ha ha, you poor chump
Guess that powder blue shirt ain't
Working out like you thought
---
You dirty hippie
You'd better not touch those limes
They go in my drink
---
The powder blue twins
Are completely upset by
The lack of pussy
---
Big Buck Safari
You exist for people who
Cannot write Haiku
---
Blond chick should back off
Your ass is not so tasty
I want it on me
---
Ugh, white guy dancing
Is always quite unpleasant
To bear witness to